跟读练习: How Motherhood Impacts Career | Momlife Crisis Ep 5 - 通过YouTube学习英语口语
B2
⏸ 已暂停
Five, four, three, two...
202 句
如果句子过短或过长，请点击 Edit 进行调整。
1
Five, four, three, two...
2
I know that my career has taken a hit.
3
I don't need anybody else to tell me that.
4
She was like, "There's no way
5
that a court is ever going to give you full custody of your daughter
6
if you cannot prove
7
that you can provide adequate care in those early morning hours." It's to the point now where I wonder,
8
"Do I have to take a pause at work?" Because I cannot give my children what they need.
9
baby announcement and in the email it said, "And she was texting on her way to the hospital while in labor to close the deal." Come on, no, no joke.
10
I remember recently hearing a story about Lily Allen and she talked about how kids ruined her career.
11
She flat out said it.
12
And that really struck me because I have found it so incredibly difficult to manage both a career that I love,
13
and children that I love.
14
And I always knew it would be a balancing act, but it's to the point now where I wonder, do I have to take a pause at work?
15
Because I cannot give my children what they need.
16
I mean, you are a lawyer, you have three children at home, Does this speak to you, the struggle?
17
- Yeah, absolutely.
18
the single hardest thing I've had to do is try to find a way
19
to have a career and thrive in that career while simultaneously being as present, as involved as a mother that I want to be.
20
And I kind of have come to the conclusion that sometimes you can't. do everything.
21
You can't do everything to the extent that you want to.
22
But when you're at work, you're trying to be focused on work and
23
you feel that sometimes they don't necessarily want to hear about the mom stuff, right?
24
And then when you're at home, your kids don't really want to hear about the work stuff.
25
But compartmentalizing those things is oftentimes impossible.
26
So yeah, the struggle is real.
27
What about you, Sharla?
28
You're a teacher.
29
You have two kids at home.
30
What's it like for you?
31
Well, I think the nature of my work is quite challenging because I'm a teacher, so I'm mothering in the classroom, and then I'm mothering when I get home.
32
Like I have to be on site in the classroom Monday to Friday.
33
So that morning chaos of getting two babies ready and dropped off in time.
34
And then at the classroom in time as well is it's challenging.
35
So I'm personally looking actively looking for a new position.
36
And also the work is like intellectual, physical, spiritual, emotional labor.
37
I have to bring my whole self into my work.
38
These are children that I'm responsible for and their growth and development.
39
So it's not it's not a light.
40
It's not a light position.
41
You know, we've spoken about, at least the three of us, needing to potentially pull out of the workforce.
42
And I can't speak for you guys, but for me, that feels anti -me.
43
it feels anti -feminist.
44
This idea that I have to trade one for the other
45
when I've been told that I should be able to manage both, I can't really wrap my head around that.
46
I mean, Steph, you have a kid.
47
How has having a daughter impacted your career options?
48
I mean, I have to be honest, the situation that you two are describing is completely separate from mine.
49
Firstly, because you have more children than I do.
50
But secondly, because my parenting arrangement is also very different.
51
So for context, my daughter's six.
52
I have her for one week on and one week off.
53
And so I'm not as burnt out as a lot of the other moms that I know.
54
A few years ago, right around the time that I was looking to get custody, child support and everything in legal documentation,
55
I remember having a consultation with a lawyer and describing my work situation.
56
And I was working for a morning show at the time.
57
And I said, you know, my work hours are 4 :00 a .m to noon, which for me had been very normal.
58
And she stopped me right there.
59
And she was like, there's no way.
60
that a court is ever going to give you full custody of your daughter
61
if you cannot prove that you can provide adequate care for that child in those early morning hours.
62
And that was the first time that somebody ever really said
63
that to me because I had always found a way to make things work
64
and I have a really good support system around me.
65
But that single -handedly got the ball rolling on being so considerate about the type of employment that I was after,
66
the type of company that I wanted to work for, the type of money that I wanted to make, and the type of hours that I needed to be working.
67
Well, I think you mentioned trying to keep work separate from life.
68
And what you just spoke to is this idea that it all merges.
69
It really does whether you want it to or not.
70
Yeah, 100%.
71
I'm curious, Sabrina, how has your relationship with ambition changed?
72
Because you are an ambitious woman.
73
How has that changed since having kids?
74
- Ah.
75
I mean, I think initially that ambition was still there, right?
76
That drive was still there.
77
And then slowly as you grow as a parent, because
78
one thing
79
that nobody realized until their mom is they're growing up as a mom as their kids are growing up as kids.
80
And I don't think I didn't realize that even about my own parents.
81
No. And so as you grow into your role as a mother, that ambition and that definition of it shifts and it changes.
82
And now, you know, I have three kids, a seven, four and one, And now my definition of ambition isn't necessarily what is my title?
83
How senior am I in the company?
84
How much responsibility do I have?
85
How many people do I manage?
86
Whereas that might have been what I thought ambition was before.
87
Now my ambition is to have a job that allows me to be the best mother I can be.
88
And in my mind that's being present, being able to join them on school functions, being able to be home and give them a hug when they come home.
89
But also a job that's fulfilling, where I'm learning, where I'm not just doing repetitive work.
90
Because the opportunity cost of me working is that time with my kids now.
91
So if I'm doing something where I don't feel like I'm useful or efficient or valued, That's going to be a...
92
a lot more of a significant thing for me now.
93
So I think it's just been a shift.
94
It's not gone, it's still there, and maybe it'll shift again, I'm sure it will.
95
But right now, it's all about that flexibility and that respect also for being a mother, a company that says okay, we understand it's a part of you and that means something to us.
96
I found that I don't know how to be ambitious anymore, given the realities of my life.
97
And I think for me, this always strikes a nerve because I always thought of myself as being super ambitious.
98
And I thought I would be the mom who put the kids to bed and kept working.
99
And the reality is it's like I get up at five for a moment of peace, but more often because a kid woke up.
100
try to get them out the door, but there's always tantrums and emotional management.
101
Get myself out the door, commute to work, do the whole work day, get home, the second job, the emotional management.
102
I'm often like vibrating up here, overstimulated, 'cause there's three screens on, and people screaming and needing something.
103
By the time I get them to bed, I cannot bring myself to work, but it's like I take that on as a personal failing.
104
you're better than this.
105
Like you are a hard worker.
106
You should be able to do this.
107
I think what you're describing is something that I suffered from for a very long time, and it's like not wanting special treatment.
108
So I remember every time I was in the workplace, because I became a mom, I was 24 when I got pregnant and 25 when I had my daughter.
109
And so I really hadn't proved proven myself like in the workplace
110
and I didn't also want to be the mom that had all these special exceptions and needed special treatment.
111
I didn't want that.
112
So there was this desperation in me to prove that I could do it all.
113
And to your question about how motherhood has changed your relationship with ambition, I don't think it changes our ambition our relationship with ambition,
114
I think it changes our ability to hustle.
115
Like this last year, I shut down my side business which I started up because I felt like I wasn't doing enough, because I only had one child,
116
and I was always talking to moms who had more than one child.
117
And I felt like I wasn't advancing fast enough in my career.
118
And this year, I was like, you know what?
119
I kind of want to chill.
120
I kind of want to relax.
121
I want to read more books.
122
I want to lay on my couch.
123
I want to watch TV.
124
I want to chill and I want to rest.
125
So I shut down my side hustle.
126
But that, like what you're describing, I don't think it's a personal failure.
127
I really do think that it is just a message
128
that we receive through so many mediums that we have to be on all the time.
129
And that if we're not on all the time, we're not spending our time wisely.
130
But sometimes rest is a choice and it's just as valid a choice as working or as working out and exercising.
131
I think just having agency over what we do with our time is crucial.
132
Well, and you make me think too about the things that we celebrate, right?
133
The things that we prioritize.
134
I remember hearing from someone who worked in the TV industry and she said, oh, you can totally, you can succeed in this career with kids.
135
I know a mom, she puts her kid to bed and then she writes until two in the morning.
136
And at the time I'm like, okay, yeah, I can do that.
137
But I remember in my gut that didn't feel that appealing.
138
I knew in my gut that that wasn't what I wanted.
139
But do you think Sabrina, that sometimes we celebrate the wrong things?
140
We glorify the wrong type of, you know, I'm not going to do that at work mom reality?
141
A hundred percent.
142
And so much of that is toned from the top.
143
So much of that is the people who are at the top of the companies, the top of the organizations, being responsible for the things that they're celebrating.
144
And I can give you examples, which are unfortunate things that I've had, like witnessed in my career.
145
I remember being at a law firm and I remember a company -wide email going out about someone's baby announcement.
146
And in the email it said, Come on.
147
No, no joke. And atrocious.
148
That goes across the company that goes to, you know, the 20 something year old articling students or summer students who are ingesting that vernacular and that mentality.
149
And then they're going to take it with them through their whole career.
150
So why do you think that's what you need to succeed?
151
Because you've probably had similar instances.
152
But I just think society has to have this level of responsibility to say, let's stop this.
153
We are not we don't have to be superhuman in every facet.
154
are of the utmost sanctity and let's just separate that from the workplace.
155
- Sharla, I'm wondering, have you ever, we've touched on this a little bit, but experienced self -doubt when it comes to, coming back to work and viewing yourself as a professional?
156
Yeah, I used to have such a high self -esteem in my career.
157
I used to weigh so much of my work and my self -identity together.
158
And I loved and took pride in all the successes that I achieved.
159
And as I'm saying this, I'm noticing that I'm speaking in the past tense.
160
And it's honestly, listen, this is reality.
161
Like the highest points in my career have been before I've had children.
162
And I know that I'm successful in different ways now, but it's, It's hard to reckon with.
163
Like, I actually ran into an ex -boss recently, and I shared with them that when I was returning from mat leave, I'm going to be going back to the classroom as a teacher,
164
And she said to me, dumbfounded, Are you serious, Sharla?
165
I can't.
166
I thought you would be the director of education by now.
167
And I was like, that is so heavy.
168
It's so loaded with judgment.
169
She's a mama herself.
170
And it's like, I know that my career has taken a hit.
171
I don't need anybody else to tell me that.
172
Well, and I think the judgment too, sometimes the most painful judgment is your own self judgment, because maybe at one point you thought you'd be the director.
173
to where you want to be or thought you'd be.
174
That's hard.
175
That's really hard.
176
- Women are so, to your point, self -judgmental.
177
Like I know stay -at -home moms who always seem to feel the need to kind of couch what they say, well, I don't work.
178
But I'm like, you don't have to say that.
179
I work your job and I'm not doing a great job of it sometimes.
180
So like more power to you if you made that choice.
181
- I do wanna ask you, how you show up at work differently, because you are a boss.
182
And I think when we've talked, you've said that having a kid made you negotiate differently, and approach interactions differently.
183
- 100%.
184
I've received a lot of really, not so sound career advice from a lot of different people.
185
And one piece of advice that I got was to never discuss your home situation in an interview.
186
And I discuss it every single time because how can I not?
187
It's weird that people don't talk about their home situation more.
188
For me, I think me being a mom is an asset.
189
And I want to work at a place that recognizes my motherhood as an asset.
190
But the other reason I bring it forward is because I need people to understand.
191
have the grace of having a secondary partner to fall on if there is an injury, if there is a reason that I can't work for a few weeks.
192
I don't have that margin of error that a lot of two -parent or two -person households do.
193
I really do believe that parenthood can be an excellent tool in discussing and in negotiating career opportunities, absolutely.
194
And you're not quiet about what you want to make.
195
I am not quiet about what I want to make.
196
And, you know, like, They're not uncomfortable for me.
197
There's nothing that is off the table in a lot of my discussions.
198
I understand that, you know, discussing your salaries can be a little bit taboo, but I feel like being transparent about that stuff is how we all win.
199
Yeah, agreed.
200
Yeah.
201
Well said.
202
Thank you.
下载应用
Everything you need to speak fluently
AI PronunciationScore every sentence
IPA PracticeMaster every sound
VocabularyBuild your word bank
Vocab GameLearn while playing
关于本课
您正在使用跟读技巧通过视频"How Motherhood Impacts Career | Momlife Crisis Ep 5"练习英语口语和发音。
每天练习15到30分钟，将显著提高您的英语流利度和发音准确度。
什么是跟读法？
跟读法 (Shadowing) 是一种有科学依据的语言学习技巧，最初开发用于专业口译员的培训，并由多语言者Alexander Arguelles博士普及。这个方法简单而强大：您在听英语母语原声的同时立即大声重复——就像是一个延迟1-2秒紧跟说话者的影子。与被动听力或语法练习不同，跟读法强迫您的大脑和口腔肌肉同时处理并模仿真实的讲话模式。研究表明它能显着提高发音准确性，语调，节奏，连读，听力理解和口语流利度——使其成为雅思口语备考和真实英语交流最有效的方法之一。